The whole world seems to revolve around one thing — the need to feel loved. This longing starts when we are just children and quietly follows us throughout our lives. Love makes us feel seen, valued, and important. Naturally, we expect to feel the deepest sense of love from our parents. But how many of us truly feel that way?

Many of us, if asked, would say, “No, I didn’t feel enough love from my parents.” Does that mean our parents didn’t love us? Not really. Most of them did — deeply. But here’s where the gap lies: the love we expected and the love they expressed were not in the same language.

Just like we speak languages we’ve learned, we also express love in ways we’ve known. If someone only knows English, you can’t expect them to suddenly speak French, right? Similarly, our parents could only show love in the way they knew — not always in the way we wanted.

For some, love means soft words. For others, it’s hugs, thoughtful gestures, physical presence, or even acts of service. If someone believes love is shown through protection, they may express it by guiding or even scolding.

For me, love has always meant touch. I constantly hug my daughters, hold their hands, and kiss them. That’s how I say “I love you.” But I often wonder — is that how they understand love? Maybe not. Their definition might be different. Still, I continue making the effort to reach them through a language they recognize.

Growing up, my mother never hugged me or kissed me. Not even once. Her love came through correction, concern, and criticism. I didn’t understand it as love back then — it only hurt. I felt unloved. But today, as I reflect, I realize: that was her language. She expressed love by trying to make sure I stayed on the right path. And that guidance, however hard it felt, shaped the strong person I am today.

So the next time your parent scolds you, before you get hurt, pause. Ask yourself — could this be their way of saying “I care”? Could this be their spoken language of love?

Love has many languages. The key is learning to listen beyond the words.

How can you shift your perspective to recognize love in all its forms—even if it’s not your preferred expression?